Last year, while still on my property in Costa Rica, I was having a bad day. My four boats all had motor problems and I had to rent boats (expensive) to operate my dolphin and whale tours. My cell phone wouldn't charge. Our battery system in the kitchen was faulty and so we didn't have lights at night (We run on a generator during the day that charges the batteries for night time electricity). Because of the boat problems and having to rent boats, two people at one of the hotels didn't get picked up for the dolphin tour, they were mad and I had to refund their money. It was just one thing after the other. I was not my usual happy, joyful self at all.
In the late afternoon, I decided to go down to BLISS BEACH, which is the beach below my property on the very point. From there I have a 220 degree panoramic ocean view and the other 140 degrees, behind me, is rainforest. I can see the island, the bay, the river mouth and far out to sea from there. NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCCCCE! It makes for incredible sunsets as there are rocks that jutt up at the very tip and make a rocky frame that the sun goes down between. It is simply breathtaking. Above is a Google Earth photo of Bliss Beach which is the point and to the left of the point.
So, I played with the dogs for a while and then spread out the blanket I had brought with me and took a look around. I had come to the beach to feel sorry for myself and have a good cry. I just needed to release. I had realized during the day that I actually feel guilty when I feel bad because of the life I have set up for myself. I mean, come on, Sierra, spectacular ocean views, the most biologically intense rainforest in the world, dolphins and whales, I am bombarded with beauty every single day. How can I feel bad? I realized that I don't let myself just cry sometimes because I feel guilty what with all the good things I have, how can I not be happy? How can I get out of appreciation for even one minute?
But I decided it was time to allow myself to feel bad, even for a few minutes. TO RELEASE. It does not serve me to hold it in or ignore it, it just gets bigger that way. So I went down to defy Bliss Beach, to not be blissful there and to feel sorry for myself and cry. I sat down and waited for the tears to come.
Backing up a bit, a few years ago, Jeff Corwin (of Animal Planet) and his film crew stayed at my eco lodge for several days to film a show (you might have seen it, with whales in Costa Rica). Anyway, those guys were fun to hang around and I picked up some new language from them. First of all, they said niiiiiiiiiiiiicccccccccccce to everything and I still say that all the time. Niiiiiiiccccce!
The other thing I picked up from them is "What would Brian Boitano say?" These guys loved the show SOUTH PARK and had every episode recorded on their portable DVD. Every night they watched SOUTH PARK and from SOUTH PARK, they got WHAT WOULD BRIAN BOITANO SAY? and they used it all the time.
It became a joke with me and my friends around here. Whenever we had a question about something, it was "What would Brian Botano say?" (Brian Boitano is a famous ice skater in case you don't know!)
So as I sat there on the beach, I asked myself "What would Brian Boitano say?" and that made me laugh out loud. Not a good start to my feel sorry/cry session. But then I got another question in my head. "What would God say?" I got a message to sit there on the beach and see everything through the Eyes of Source. My present situation and all that is around me.
As I saw my situation through the Eyes of Source, it seemed that I was just stuck in "what is" for a brief moment, a hold up of my allowing and flowing. I was instructed to see money as a flowing river and that river comes flowing to me always. I saw that my broken cell phone was in response to me getting annoyed with all the phone calls and asking the phone to stop ringing so much. I got what I asked for! Imagine that!
As I saw my life through the eyes of Source, many things were explained to me and none of the problems seemed big anymore. In fact they seemed just like the temporary contrasts that they are, contrasts to allow me to set of rockets off desire for something better. Through Source's eyes, I saw how I actually create contrast sometimes just for the learning and expansion. I mean, wow, my life is soooo good, that I have to CREATE CONTRAST! I make things bigger than they really are! Aren't us humans funny that way?
Then I started to look around me. All the boats in the bay that usually bother me because of "human impedance on nature" I saw as wonderful tools for people, who are part of this planet and nature too, to get around and enjoy this incredible area. I saw the shrimp boat coming in, which I usually throw not so nice thoughts at, through the Eyes of Source.
I started to get happier and happier. More Joy poured through my body. I put on my Ipod to a playlist I had made earlier. I had downloaded Om Namaha Shiva by Sheila Chandra and another one by Panta Rhei, one of the most beautiful pieces of music I have ever heard.
I played them over and over as the sun went down and BLISS BEACH did it's thing, and brought me to bliss once again. I felt a moment of sadness as it got dark because I was so enjoying the view, but then the fireflies came out in force. The whole beach was sparkling with fireflies!! It was completely and totally magical, like a fairy tale dream!! And I was seeing it all through the Eyes of Source.
I could have stayed there all night, and that actually had been my plan, but a light rain started and I gathered up my things and walked up the path to my room.
I tried, but I could not defy Bliss Beach! It brought me to bliss once again and gave me a new question to ask instead of referring to Brian Boitano.
WHAT WOULD GOD SAY?